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Eight "Bros" Live as Roman Gladiators in ITV's Reality Show "Bromans"

9/19/2017

10 Comments

 
​This season, Ancient Aliens has given one ancient astronaut theorist per week an episode spotlight. The talking head gets to go on an all-expenses-paid vacation to a tourist destination, and gets to be the featured on-location contributor discussing his favorite pet subject. While this might seem like a cute way to revitalize an aging franchise by shaking up the talking head formula a little bit, it is also an efficient way of squeezing more money out of the fringe history circus. 
​Our case in point today is Friday’s episode, which spotlighted the “work” of Andrew Collins, an all-purpose mystery-monger who will happily flit between aliens, Atlantis, and the Nephilim as the market dictates. On Friday, he was in ancient astronaut mode, but not before the show gave him a platform to promote his 2014 book on the Turkish site of Göbekli Tepe, which the show mentioned by name, displaying the book’s cover for the show’s 1.5-million-strong audience.
 
Collins took to Twitter shortly after the episode aired to announce that as a result of the publicity, his book became Amazon’s #1 bestseller in the Ancient Mysteries category. While Amazon categories are narrow enough, and updated frequently enough, that this might not necessarily translate into huge numbers in absolute sales, presumably the Ancient Mysteries category is a big enough one that Collins pocket more than a little coin from his spotlight episode of Ancient Aliens. It is evidence, though, that Ancient Aliens, American television’s longest running series devoted to ancient history, continues to drive the conversation surrounding ancient history and can distort the marketplace for books on the subject when it puts its weight behind a given product.
 
Speaking of distortions, I thought that for a change of pace it might be interesting to review ITV2’s newest reality competition series, Bromans, which began airing in Britain last week. Since I will admit nothing, suffice it to say that I saw it via magic. The show, as the name implies, takes eight dim-bulb “bros” and their equally intellectual girlfriends and whisks them off to an elaborate outdoor set recreating an ancient Roman town where the “bros” live and train as gladiators. The set, according to media reports, was originally built for the ancient-Rome-set sitcom Plebs and is located in Bulgaria. The borrowed opulence makes the show seem much more impressive than its limited budget and ambitions actually are. For American audiences, it might be best to imagine the cast of Jersey Shore or Party Down South joining a troupe of Civil War reenactors. I will admit that I ended up enjoying the show in spite of its odd juxtaposition of down-market reality trash with Classical trappings.
 
Let’s not mince words: The twentysomething British idiots—the “lads,” as the show calls them—are among the dumbest dumbbells I’ve ever seen on reality TV. One thinks that the world is flat and wrongly praises the Romans for knowing the “truth” about the flat earth. Another, upon arriving in the recreated Roman street, proudly proclaims that he had never gone back in time so far before: “I’ve gone 2,000 years back? I’ve never lived that far back. I’ve only seen lamp posts and pavements.” All of the contestants are well-versed in American reality show clichés and talk almost exclusively in them. They are, after all, in it to win it, will totally dominate everything and everyone, and of course are not here to make friends. The saving grace is that they also laugh at themselves for spouting such semi-scripted lines. At least I hope they are laughing at themselves. They might just be too dim to know why they are laughing.
 
And yet, British reality shows often employ a humorous narrator (here it is American-born British radio personality Roman Kemp) whose mocking commentary provides a critical distance from the events on screen that provides just enough of a separation between the viewer and the viewed to allow the viewer to enjoy the program with the understanding that everyone involved is in on the joke. It was pretty much the narration that made Come Dine with Me something more entertaining than literally watching regular people make dinner. Even The Sun, in trashing the show, made the same point this morning: “say what you like about this show, it’s brutally aware of its own limitations and sends itself up mercilessly.”
 
Archaeologist Kristina Killgrove hated the show for not being historically accurate, while Classicist Andrew Sillett saw things more my way and considered it an entertaining diversion that captured the spirit of Rome’s orgiastic excess. For all Killgrove’s carping, the show’s emphasis on nudity, bizarre spectacle, and humiliating the plebs is pretty much Rome in a nutshell. I think that part of my reaction is probably due to the fact that as an American, I don’t see that much British reality TV, so the differences in style between the U.K. and America are somewhat amusing, but also due to the fact that so much American reality TV is so exploitative and casually cruel that it is almost quaint to see a relatively good- natured, if somewhat vulgar, approach.
 
Ultimately, the patina of Classical culture and ancient history was just amusing enough that I found Bromans to be a silly and enjoyable trifle.
10 Comments
Ken
9/19/2017 11:34:57 am

Will they be fighting to the death in any competitions? I'd watch that.

Reply
An Over-Educated Grunt
9/19/2017 11:53:52 am

I'll be honest, I look forward to your Tuesday stories, not because of the content but because staring at Ancient Aliens headlines for a couple days is just depressing.

Honestly, having watched plenty of bad American programming, AA and AU included, just to watch the train derail, I might have to use magic myself.

Reply
Only Me
9/19/2017 11:56:40 am

While Bromans doesn't sound like a show I'd watch (I don't like any reality TV), I really detest the complaint, "It's not historically accurate!" No shit! You want accuracy, go watch a documentary.

While an effort made to be accurate is appreciated with movies set in a specific time period, bitching about lack of accuracy from what is obviously a reality show is just stupid.

Reply
Americanegro
9/19/2017 12:10:48 pm

I'm just you used magic instead of tunnelbear.

Reply
Americanegro
9/19/2017 04:24:33 pm

"just glad"

Dammit!

Reply
Clete
9/19/2017 12:16:27 pm

I agree with you, sometimes you have to give the serious part of your brain a rest and just view or read trash. Some of my ex-coworkers wondered why I was such a fan of "Family Guy". I told them that I knew it was basically trash, but it was a change from what I would normally watch. I also read Clive Cussler novels for the same reason. I mean the hero of the novels, Dirk Pitt, made Superman look like a wuss.

Reply
David Bradbury
9/19/2017 01:28:40 pm

"The set, according to media reports, was originally built for the ancient-Rome-set sitcom Plebs"
In case anybody's wondering, media reports are rarely trustworthy, even in reporting very recent events. Plebs, also an ITV2 show (any British TV channel with a 2 on the end of its name gets only a fraction of the budget of the equivalent with a 1 at the end of its name) is filmed on a set originally built for the 2004 cable TV version of Spartacus, at Nu Boyana studios. After the first season of Plebs was completed the set was reused for a couple of feature films, notably The Legend of Hercules (i.e. the Renny Harlin flop, not the the one with The Rock), so ITV2 were delighted to find that various extra bits had been added by the time they started shooting their second season ...

Reply
Jason Colavito link
9/19/2017 02:21:18 pm

It sounds like that set is Bulgaria's version of the backlot street best known as Wisteria Lane, the set of Desperate Housewives, which has a long history of appearing in pretty much everything going back to the 1950s.

Reply
Dan D'Silva
9/19/2017 03:42:06 pm

I may be one of the carpers, but I wonder why the previews said that the contestants will "live and fight like gladiators did 2000 years ago." It's kind of like the King Arthur movie that billed itself as the "True Story Behind the Legend." Why?

Reply
Bob Jase
9/19/2017 04:26:48 pm

"The show, as the name implies, takes eight dim-bulb “bros” and their equally intellectual girlfriends and whisks them off to an elaborate outdoor set recreating an ancient Roman town where the “bros” live and train as gladiators."

Damn, if I hit the lottery tonight I'm going to recruit a few dozen aquaintances from the SCA because I've found a village to pillage.

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    • Collection: Ancient Alien Fraud >
      • Chariots of the Gods at 50
      • Secret History of Ancient Astronauts
      • Of Atlantis and Aliens
      • Aliens and Ancient Texts
      • Profiles in Ancient Astronautics >
        • Erich von Däniken
        • Robert Temple
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        • David Childress
      • Blunders in the Sky
      • The Case of the False Quotes
      • Alternative Authors' Quote Fraud
      • David Childress & the Aliens
      • Faking Ancient Art in Uzbekistan
      • Intimations of Persecution
      • Zecharia Sitchin's World
      • Jesus' Alien Ancestors?
      • Extraterrestrial Evolution?
    • Collection: Skeptic Magazine >
      • America Before Review
      • Native American Discovery of Europe
      • Interview: Scott Sigler
      • Golden Fleeced
      • Oh the Horror
      • Discovery of America
      • Supernatural Television
      • Review of Civilization One
      • Who Lost the Middle Ages
      • Charioteer of the Gods
    • Collection: Ancient History >
      • Prehistoric Nuclear War
      • The China Syndrome
      • Atlantis, Mu, and the Maya
      • Easter Island Exposed
      • Who Built the Sphinx?
      • Who Built the Great Pyramid?
      • Archaeological Cover Up?
    • Collection: The Lovecraft Legacy >
      • Pauwels, Bergier, and Lovecraft
      • Lovecraft in Bergier
      • Lovecraft and Scientology
    • Collection: UFOs >
      • Alien Abduction at the Outer Limits
      • Aliens and Anal Probes
      • Ultra-Terrestrials and UFOs
      • Rebels, Queers, and Aliens
    • Scholomance: The Devil's School
    • Prehistory of Chupacabra
    • The Templars, the Holy Grail, & Henry Sinclair
    • Magicians of the Gods Review
    • The Curse of the Pharaohs
    • The Antediluvian Pyramid Myth
    • Whitewashing American Prehistory
    • James Dean's Cursed Porsche
  • The Library
    • Ancient Mysteries >
      • Ancient Texts >
        • Mesopotamian Texts >
          • Atrahasis Epic
          • Epic of Gilgamesh
          • Kutha Creation Legend
          • Babylonian Creation Myth
          • Descent of Ishtar
          • Berossus
          • Comparison of Antediluvian Histories
        • Egyptian Texts >
          • The Shipwrecked Sailor
          • Dream Stela of Thutmose IV
          • The Papyrus of Ani
          • Classical Accounts of the Pyramids
          • Inventory Stela
          • Manetho
          • Eratosthenes' King List
          • The Story of Setna
          • Leon of Pella
          • Diodorus on Egyptian History
          • On Isis and Osiris
          • Famine Stela
          • Old Egyptian Chronicle
          • The Book of Sothis
          • Horapollo
          • Al-Maqrizi's King List
        • Teshub and the Dragon
        • Hermetica >
          • The Three Hermeses
          • Kore Kosmou
          • Corpus Hermeticum
          • The Asclepius
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          • Prologue to the Kyranides
          • The Secret of Creation
          • Ancient Alphabets Explained
          • Prologue to Ibn Umayl's Silvery Water
          • Book of the 24 Philosophers
          • Aurora of the Philosophers
        • Hesiod's Theogony
        • Periplus of Hanno
        • Ctesias' Indica
        • Sanchuniathon
        • Sima Qian
        • Syncellus's Enoch Fragments
        • The Book of Enoch
        • Slavonic Enoch
        • Sepher Yetzirah
        • Tacitus' Germania
        • De Dea Syria
        • Aelian's Various Histories
        • Julius Africanus' Chronography
        • Eusebius' Chronicle
        • Chinese Accounts of Rome
        • Ancient Chinese Automaton
        • The Orphic Argonautica
        • Fragments of Panodorus
        • Annianus on the Watchers
        • The Watchers and Antediluvian Wisdom
      • Medieval Texts >
        • Medieval Legends of Ancient Egypt >
          • Medieval Pyramid Lore
          • John Malalas on Ancient Egypt
          • Fragments of Abenephius
          • Akhbar al-zaman
          • Ibrahim ibn Wasif Shah
          • Murtada ibn al-‘Afif
          • Al-Maqrizi on the Pyramids
          • Al-Suyuti on the Pyramids
        • The Hunt for Noah's Ark
        • Isidore of Seville
        • Book of Liang: Fusang
        • Agobard on Magonia
        • Book of Thousands
        • Voyage of Saint Brendan
        • Power of Art and of Nature
        • Travels of Sir John Mandeville
        • Yazidi Revelation and Black Book
        • Al-Biruni on the Great Flood
        • Voyage of the Zeno Brothers
        • The Kensington Runestone (Hoax)
        • Islamic Discovery of America
        • The Aztec Creation Myth
      • Lost Civilizations >
        • Atlantis >
          • Plato's Atlantis Dialogues >
            • Timaeus
            • Critias
          • Fragments on Atlantis
          • Panchaea: The Other Atlantis
          • Eumalos on Atlantis (Hoax)
          • Gómara on Atlantis
          • Sardinia and Atlantis
          • Santorini and Atlantis
          • The Mound Builders and Atlantis
          • Donnelly's Atlantis
          • Atlantis in Morocco
          • Atlantis and the Sea Peoples
          • W. Scott-Elliot >
            • The Story of Atlantis
            • The Lost Lemuria
          • The Lost Atlantis
          • Atlantis in Africa
          • How I Found Atlantis (Hoax)
          • Termier on Atlantis
          • The Critias and Minoan Crete
          • Rebuttal to Termier
          • Further Responses to Termier
          • Flinders Petrie on Atlantis
        • Lost Cities >
          • Miscellaneous Lost Cities
          • The Seven Cities
          • The Lost City of Paititi
          • Manuscript 512
          • The Idolatrous City of Iximaya (Hoax)
          • The 1885 Moberly Lost City Hoax
          • The Elephants of Paredon (Hoax)
        • OOPARTs
        • Oronteus Finaeus Antarctica Map
        • Caucasians in Panama
        • Jefferson's Excavation
        • Fictitious Discoveries in America
        • Against Diffusionism
        • Tunnels Under Peru
        • The Parahyba Inscription (Hoax)
        • Mound Builders
        • Gunung Padang
        • Tales of Enchanted Islands
        • The 1907 Ancient World Map Hoax
        • The 1909 Grand Canyon Hoax
        • The Interglacial Period
        • Solving Oak Island
      • Religious Conspiracies >
        • Pantera, Father of Jesus?
        • Toledot Yeshu
        • Peter of les Vaux-de-Cernay on Cathars
        • Testimony of Jean de Châlons
        • Rosslyn Chapel and the 'Prentice's Pillar
        • The Many Wives of Jesus
        • Templar Infiltration of Labor
        • Louis Martin & the Holy Bloodline
        • The Life of St. Issa (Hoax)
        • On the Person of Jesus Christ
      • Giants in the Earth >
        • Fossil Origins of Myths >
          • Fossil Teeth and Bones of Elephants
          • Fossil Elephants
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          • Fossil Mammoths and Giants
          • Giants' Bones Dug Out of the Earth
          • Fossils and the Supernatural
          • Fossils, Myth, and Pseudo-History
          • Man During the Stone Age
          • Fossil Bones and Giants
          • American Elephant Myths
          • The Mammoth and the Flood
          • Fossils and Myth
          • Fossil Origin of the Cyclops
          • Mastodon, Mammoth, and Man
        • Fragments on Giants
        • Manichaean Book of Giants
        • Geoffrey on British Giants
        • Alfonso X's Hermetic History of Giants
        • Boccaccio and the Fossil 'Giant'
        • Book of Howth
        • Purchas His Pilgrimage
        • Edmond Temple's 1827 Giant Investigation
        • The Giants of Sardinia
        • Giants and the Sons of God
        • The Magnetism of Evil
        • Tertiary Giants
        • Smithsonian Giant Reports
        • Early American Giants
        • The Giant of Coahuila
        • Jewish Encyclopedia on Giants
        • Index of Giants
        • Newspaper Accounts of Giants
        • Lanier's A Book of Giants
      • Science and History >
        • Halley on Noah's Comet
        • The Newport Tower
        • Iron: The Stone from Heaven
        • Ararat and the Ark
        • Pyramid Facts and Fancies
        • Argonauts before Homer
        • The Deluge
        • Crown Prince Rudolf on the Pyramids
        • Old Mythology in New Apparel
        • Blavatsky on Dinosaurs
        • Teddy Roosevelt on Bigfoot
        • Devil Worship in France
        • Maspero's Review of Akhbar al-zaman
        • The Holy Grail as Lucifer's Crown Jewel
        • The Mutinous Sea
        • The Rock Wall of Rockwall
        • Fabulous Zoology
        • The Origins of Talos
        • Mexican Mythology
        • Chinese Pyramids
        • Maqrizi's Names of the Pharaohs
      • Extreme History >
        • Roman Empire Hoax
        • American Antiquities
        • American Cataclysms
        • England, the Remnant of Judah
        • Historical Chronology of the Mexicans
        • Maspero on the Predynastic Sphinx
        • Vestiges of the Mayas
        • Ragnarok: The Age of Fire and Gravel
        • Origins of the Egyptian People
        • The Secret Doctrine >
          • Volume 1: Cosmogenesis
          • Volume 2: Anthropogenesis
        • Phoenicians in America
        • The Electric Ark
        • Traces of European Influence
        • Prince Henry Sinclair
        • Pyramid Prophecies
        • Templars of Ancient Mexico
        • Chronology and the "Riddle of the Sphinx"
        • The Faith of Ancient Egypt
        • Spirit of the Hour in Archaeology
        • Book of the Damned
        • Great Pyramid As Noah's Ark
        • Richard Shaver's Proofs
    • Alien Encounters >
      • US Government Ancient Astronaut Files >
        • Fortean Society and Columbus
        • Inquiry into Shaver and Palmer
        • The Skyfort Document
        • Whirling Wheels
        • Denver Ancient Astronaut Lecture
        • Soviet Search for Lemuria
        • Visitors from Outer Space
        • Unidentified Flying Objects (Abstract)
        • "Flying Saucers"? They're a Myth
        • UFO Hypothesis Survival Questions
        • Air Force Academy UFO Textbook
        • The Condon Report on Ancient Astronauts
        • Atlantis Discovery Telegrams
        • Ancient Astronaut Society Telegram
        • Noah's Ark Cables
        • The Von Daniken Letter
        • CIA Psychic Probe of Ancient Mars
        • Scott Wolter Lawsuit
        • UFOs in Ancient China
        • CIA Report on Noah's Ark
        • CIA Noah's Ark Memos
        • Congressional Ancient Aliens Testimony
        • Ancient Astronaut and Nibiru Email
        • Congressional Ancient Mars Hearing
        • House UFO Hearing
      • Ancient Extraterrestrials >
        • Premodern UFO Sightings
        • The Moon Hoax
        • Inhabitants of Other Planets
        • Blavatsky on Ancient Astronauts
        • The Stanzas of Dzyan (Hoax)
        • Aerolites and Religion
        • What Is Theosophy?
        • Plane of Ether
        • The Adepts from Venus
      • A Message from Mars
      • Saucer Mystery Solved?
      • Orville Wright on UFOs
      • Interdimensional Flying Saucers
      • Flying Saucers Are Real
      • Report on UFOs
    • The Supernatural >
      • The Devils of Loudun
      • Sublime and Beautiful
      • Voltaire on Vampires
      • Demonology and Witchcraft
      • Thaumaturgia
      • Bulgarian Vampires
      • Religion and Evolution
      • Transylvanian Superstitions
      • Defining a Zombie
      • Dread of the Supernatural
      • Vampires
      • Werewolves and Vampires and Ghouls
      • Science and Fairy Stories
      • The Cursed Car
    • Classic Fiction >
      • Lucian's True History
      • Some Words with a Mummy
      • The Coming Race
      • King Solomon's Mines
      • An Inhabitant of Carcosa
      • The Xipéhuz
      • Lot No. 249
      • The Novel of the Black Seal
      • The Island of Doctor Moreau
      • Pharaoh's Curse
      • Edison's Conquest of Mars
      • The Lost Continent
      • Count Magnus
      • The Mysterious Stranger
      • The Wendigo
      • Sredni Vashtar
      • The Lost World
      • The Red One
      • H. P. Lovecraft >
        • Dagon
        • The Call of Cthulhu
        • History of the Necronomicon
        • At the Mountains of Madness
        • Lovecraft's Library in 1932
      • The Skeptical Poltergeist
      • The Corpse on the Grating
      • The Second Satellite
      • Queen of the Black Coast
      • A Martian Odyssey
    • Classic Genre Movies
    • Miscellaneous Documents >
      • The Balloon-Hoax
      • A Problem in Greek Ethics
      • The Migration of Symbols
      • The Gospel of Intensity
      • De Profundis
      • The Life and Death of Crown Prince Rudolf
      • The Bathtub Hoax
      • Crown Prince Rudolf's Letters
      • Position of Viking Women
      • Employment of Homosexuals
      • James Dean's Love Letters
      • The Amazing James Dean Hoax!
    • Free Classic Pseudohistory eBooks
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