There is no new episode of Ancient Aliens tonight due to the History Channel’s car-focused programming week. (What, no “Aliens and Automobiles” episode?) So, it looks like I get the night off! That would be great, except that I am bombarded with work today. Therefore, I’m going to keep today’s posting short. I read yesterday about a bizarre pseudohistorical fantasy that has developed a small but influential group of followers in Poland. It is so transparently a Polish nationalist myth that I am amazed anyone could take it seriously. According to historian Mateusz Fafinski, a group of pseudoscholars known as the Turboslavs (an apparently mocking term favored by their opponents) have developed a myth based on a forged “ancient” text that describes the “true” history of the Poles. According to this myth, the Polish nation emerged 70,000 years ago from a wandering tribe of Aryan supermen who once ruled all of the Slavic lands from the Danube through to the Urals. As Aryan believers in the One True Faith of Arianism, they ruled supreme and withstood all attacks until the first king of Poland, Mieszko I, came to the throne in the 900s CE. By converting to Christianity, he corrupted the Aryan purity of the Lechia Empire, resulting in the subjugation of the Poles to the Germans when Mieszko made Poland a vassal of the Holy Roman Empire. The believers in this myth lay their faith in the Slavic-Sarmatian Chronicle of Prokosz, a forgery written the 1700s by Przybysław Dyjamentowski and printed in 1825. Although recognized as a hoax from 1826 on, the believers claim the document to be real. As Fafinski notes, the proponents of this myth are following a familiar narrative common to most fringe historians, but one that is also present in the nationalist versions of history promulgated by nationalist governments: “Everything is framed as ‘uncovering the truth’ and, if I may be allowed a literal translation, ‘de-lying’ history. For history, you must know, has been stolen from Polish people. Historiography is just another tool through which enemies oppress Poland by stealing its history from it (a note very much present in the current government’s narration).” I will recommend Fafinski’s entire article to you, as it is an excellent examination of an unusual historical fabrication in a part of the world where language barriers often prevent us from seeing as clearly as some other nations’ pseudohistorical absurdities. I’ll close this section with this paragraph that sums up Fafinski’s analysis of why Aryan narratives appeal to Poles, the victims of the last round of Aryan supremacist ideology in Europe: In this mindset Poles and Poland fulfill a divine historical mission (it is almost funny how close this right-wing fantasy comes to historical determinism) that is constantly foiled by Germany and Russia (and their previous incarnations). Turboslavism is just an iteration of that myth, with greater emphasis put on Germany as the enemy. It is also easier to believe and more difficult to disprove because it mostly happens in the distant past. That myth is also subtly racist - Poles are better, have almost divine origins, are “the martyrs of the world” and suffer for other nations. In the Turboslav ideology it is expressed by being descendants of Aryans (it is hard to ignore subtle Nazi parallels here…) As Fafinski notes, the Turboslav myth is closely associated with rightwing politics, and as such, I would say that it bears some resemblance to the way the so-called alt-right uses Solutreans, hyperdiffusionism, and lost white races to create a mythical history for America that places white Europeans at the origin of every facet of North American life.
42 Comments
Bob Jase
8/18/2017 11:47:34 am
Am I understanding this right - this super empire (which no other civilization sknew about) began 70,000 years ago, last until just over a 1,000 years ago but managed to leave zero traces of itself?
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Clete
8/18/2017 12:05:11 pm
Why is that so hard to believe. They left, leaving no trace of themselves, tearing down their homes, public buildings and roads. Why they even took their toilets with them. They vanished, probably into thin air, not even leaving their shit for future generations to study and marvel at.
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Americanegro
8/18/2017 03:16:35 pm
Actually they did leave behind lots of artifacts and records, just not from 70,000 years ago. 8/20/2017 11:25:32 pm
yep. of course that's how it goes. notice it is a direct attack on Christianity and reeks of reconstructionist paganism, except they are usually more historically and archaeologically sound than this, but the idea is the same, blame everything on Christianity and demand a return to your "roots" and the false gods of your distant ancestors.
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Americanegro
8/20/2017 11:42:40 pm
How does this blame anything on Christianity and why is your false god better than any other false god?
John
11/8/2018 03:00:11 pm
Actually there is concrete proof.
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Dan D'Silva
8/18/2017 12:37:27 pm
I don't think I've heard a word or phrase on this blog that made me grin as much as "the Turboslavs."
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Not the Comte de Saint Germain
8/18/2017 08:39:17 pm
Not even "Egyptian-Hebrew-Gnostic-Habsburg-Templar-Freemason-US Government-Exxon-REMAX-Nabisco conspiracy"?
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Riley V
8/19/2017 12:30:34 pm
Not REMAX. It was Century 21. The UN Troops will be housed in Century 21 houses as part of the Jade Helm invasion. It is all laid out in Agenda 21.
Americanegro
8/19/2017 02:54:38 pm
No, it was REMAX. It has the hooked X in the logo.
Scott David Hamilton
8/18/2017 01:15:47 pm
I assume the Turboslavs will eventually be replaced by the NOSslavs.
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BigNick
8/18/2017 01:37:20 pm
How many polish super aryans does it take to build an empire that lasts 70000 years
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Only Me
8/18/2017 03:08:57 pm
These Aryan myth believers are going to have a hell of a time trying to determine just who are the "true descendants". Too many claimants to the throne, so to speak.
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TONY S.
8/18/2017 10:28:57 pm
I'd love to see one of the champions of the fringe try to connect all of their tales into one all encompassing, cohesive timeline.
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Matt
8/19/2017 09:35:45 pm
The Grand Unified Theory.
Jim
8/18/2017 04:57:02 pm
Unfortunately, not having alien intervention, the Super Poles never learned how to make really big piles of rocks. I'm afraid their pitiful attempts at building pyramids will leave them on the back burner of history.
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Zig
11/8/2018 02:57:11 pm
Check DNA evidence, mate. Just because you are ignorant can’t be helped!
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Kai
11/13/2019 02:50:54 pm
Couldn't it be the DNA proofs exactly the other conclusion? I'm pretty sure all polish people are actually chinese with a small tracees of persian.
Graham
8/18/2017 09:27:57 pm
It does, all fringe claims of a glorious past, whether it be the Alt-Rights claims about Solutreans, the Turboslavs claims about Poles or Afrocentrist claims that Ancient Egyptians were black (as were the ancestors of all Navtive Americans.) are built around the rewriting of the past to provide a glorious ancestry. For example if you look at the early British King lists you will find Julius Caesar and Wotan amongst the ancestors.
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Americanegro
8/18/2017 09:54:29 pm
Okay, so let's label everything stupid or bad as Alt-Right. As a well-know expert code-named Scott Wolter recently told Andre Kovac, the Solutreans were merely "following the seal herds" (as one does) because there were no animals on the European landmass in those days. They were HONGRY.
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Mannxos the Great
8/19/2017 12:20:10 pm
The Alt-Right is stupid too. Graham also mentioned Afrocentrism but you only talk if the word "Right" is mentioned. Stop being a RW snow flake. This is nothing political and trying to defend the alt- right from criticism is stupid. Good day sir.
Americanegro
8/19/2017 03:01:28 pm
The Solutrean Hypothesis predates the Alt-Right by a good bit, so you can shut it. Now show me on the doll where the bad man triggered you. 8/20/2017 11:29:55 pm
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BL9S-TUikfg
Americanegro
8/18/2017 10:08:03 pm
Where does one go to see these lists? Julius Caesar certainly was effectively King of England for a while, but I'm having difficulty finding these lists. Thanks.
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TONY S.
8/18/2017 10:26:37 pm
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Not the Comte de Saint Germain
8/18/2017 10:55:19 pm
Well, the Indo-European migration did probably originate from southwestern Russia.
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Americanegro
8/18/2017 11:39:16 pm
Since it didn't actually cause a problem, it wouldn't have caused a problem.
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MartyR
8/20/2017 02:36:57 pm
The Aliens and Automobiles program would begin with a look at My Mother the Car.
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Geo
8/21/2017 03:35:10 pm
Heh heh...
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Pacal
8/20/2017 06:05:51 pm
This stuff reminds me of the bat shit crazy writings of Fomenko who argues that much history is fraud perpetuated in an effort to keep Russians down.
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Americanegro
8/20/2017 09:01:08 pm
Never heard of this guy before so thank. He seems to be Ukrainian by birth but I don't know the system over there. Anyway...
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El Cid
8/21/2017 08:37:51 pm
Genetically, there *were* no 'white' Europeans until around 7,000 years ago when the older European migrants interbred with newer, farming migrants from Anatolia.
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Americanegro
8/21/2017 09:57:25 pm
Thanks for the Turkocentric worldview. From an article BASED ON ONE SKELETON, with multiple skin color alleles.
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El Cid
8/22/2017 02:51:46 pm
There was no Turkey at that time. It wasn't even yet Anatolia. The populations who journeyed *from* Turkey weren't argued to have originated in modern day Turkey specifically, but part of the large migrations of farming populations out of that region of the world--including the Mesopotamian regions.
Americanegro
8/22/2017 04:24:39 pm
Turkic ≠ from Turkey you idiot.
El Cid
8/22/2017 08:19:45 pm
I can't read?
Americanegro
8/22/2017 10:43:05 pm
"Blue eyes as a genetic trait only began to spread after 14,000 years ago". The "7000 years" is linked to "across *much of the continent*.
Steve StC
8/27/2017 10:50:14 pm
American Negro, you are a vile and hateful piece of filth. You make this already hateful place far worse.
El Cid
8/25/2017 06:22:59 pm
"Both traits, the researchers concluded, were likely brought to Europe by migration from the Near East."
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Kai
11/13/2019 03:05:59 pm
EL CID
Adam
8/22/2017 06:11:35 am
Hi Jason,
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Momus
8/27/2017 07:28:18 am
Well said. The ones actually promoting in the theory seem to be on the fringe of Polish neopagan scene. They are not "influential" in any sense. However the interest in the theory seems to extend far beyond just those who endorse it, and that may reflect the global trend of pseudoscience/conspiracy theory becoming more popular, also in Polish society. There used to be something along those lines in the early '90s (after the first free ellections), when dowsing, shape radiation, and bioenergotherapy, as well as newly imported western New Age ideas became flavor of the day in Poland and other former communist countries (first and foremost in Russia). These days this seems to be a worldwide fad.
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AuthorI am an author and researcher focusing on pop culture, science, and history. Bylines: New Republic, Esquire, Slate, etc. There's more about me in the About Jason tab. Newsletters
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