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Review of Ancient Aliens S06E02 "The Crystal Skulls"

10/8/2013

24 Comments

 
The crystal skulls have been debunked so many times that I’m not sure how anyone could possibly produce and entire hour on them in all seriousness. The claim that the crystal skulls are real depends on accepting the Mitchell-Hedges narrative at face value, which conflicts with documentary sources, and it depends on assuming that the crystal skulls are beyond the ability of humans to replicate, which is also not true.

Now here is where the problem comes in: There are many different types of crystal skulls that began to show up in art markets and in antiquarian reports in the nineteenth century and upon which the large skulls of the modern era are based. These earliest reported crystal skulls, however, measure only one to seven inches in size, and none can be shown to be genuinely Mexican—indeed most passed through the hands of a very few collectors and jewelers in Europe. Ancient Aliens chose not to differentiate between small skulls and the life-size skulls, which are almost certainly fake. Ancient Aliens wants us to believe there are twelve full-size genuine crystal skulls, but this is simply a modern lie; the number was selected by numerologists from among the dozens of fakes. The fact remains that not a single crystal skull has ever been excavated in a documented archaeological context, or ever documented as being in the possession of actual Native peoples.

None of this matters because Ancient Aliens S06E02 “The Crystal Skulls” is not a “documentary” but an infomercial, trying to sell us a wide range of products in the guise of “educating” us about them. It’s also a little bit of a technical deception in that the first five episodes of this season were actually filmed for last season but were reassigned to season six for promotional reasons.

Chris Morton, author of The Mystery of the Crystal Skulls, is frankly wrong when he attributes to ancient legend claims that the skulls are possessed of great mystical power. This is all hokum created in the twentieth century. I am particularly annoyed by the attribution of “legend” and “myth” to stories about the thirteen skulls (it was twelve two minutes earlier, but who’s counting?) forming a global power grid and initiating the return of the gods. None of this can be show to exist prior to the late twentieth century.

The Mitchell-Hedges skull story is rehearsed, with William Henry supporting its authenticity. The story is a well-known fake contradicted by facts (Mitchell-Hedges bought it in 1944, two decades after he allegedly discovered it and somehow failed to record the miraculous discovery), but David Childress isn’t interested in that. He relates all manner of paranormal claims for the skull.

“The entire mythology of the Mayans is based on extraterrestrial encounters in the past,” Giorgio Tsoukalos says, apropos of nothing, in claiming that the Mitchell-Hedges skull was delivered to the Maya from aliens.

We move on to a skull named “Synergy” allegedly from Melanesia, which the natives apparently, as all natives in these kinds of stories do, drop everything to bow down and worship the artifact brought back to them by the Great White Savior, Sherry Whitfield, the current owner. The show neglects to note that the owner of the skull, Whitfield, believes that it comes from the geologically impossible sunken continent of Lemuria and that far from respecting the skull’s Native heritage as she claims, she in fact uses it as a source of income, selling merchandise and pimping out its alleged “sacred mysteries” for cash—mysteries she claims on-air are so unutterably sacred that the Natives refuse to speak of them except when she lets them visit the skull and worship it. The whole colonialist narrative is disturbing and sad.

Tsoukalos returns to claim that Pacific mythologies talk about sky gods who are aliens. There are in fact sky gods, but there are also many sea gods. In fact, several Pacific cultures have an octopus god who lives in a stone palace under the sea, is resurrected on occasion, and brings terror and madness to those who meet him. His name is, in Tonga, Tutula. Does this mean that Cthulhu is also real? Of course not; you can find anything you want in ancient stories, but that doesn’t mean that similarities in stories imply connections—or a reality behind them.

Having run out of crystal skulls, we move on to crystal balls, with the assertion that crystals can be used to access other dimensions, where the aliens live. William Henry argues that crystals are interdimensional substances whose lattice-like molecular makeup communicates across dimensions, and David Childress tells us that the natives believed crystal was a “high-tech” object and that the ancients got them from extraterrestrials.

That didn’t make any sense, so we forget about any claim that can be tested—surely if skull communication gateways are as “scientific” as Childress and Henry claim, they can fire one up and get Yog-Sothoth on the horn—and we instead move on Mysteries of the East! This time the next skull is named “Amar” and weighs 22 pounds. Supposedly this skull was smuggled out of Tibet by an unnamed “High Lama” during the Chinese invasion of Tibet, which appears to be a fairy story concocted to make the skull valuable enough to exploit as part of another fundraising scheme. Would it surprise you to know that the story is sourced only to the website I just linked to, and that it doesn’t exist in the literature prior to a few years ago? The Dalai Lama is not a shy man; surely, he would let us know if a sacred crystal power skull were missing. He never said anything about it to me the couple of times he has given speeches in places where I was living.

Next: NAZIS! Another crystal skull with no provenance, this time found in Bavaria and attributed to Heinrich Himmler based on nothing more than speculation that Himmler liked ancient artifacts and skulls. Himmler wasn’t shy about his occult material, and there is no record of crystal skulls in the academic Nazi occult literature. These specific claims appear to originate with the 2004 book Reich of the Black Sun by Joseph P. Farrell, a 2004 book published by David Childress’s Adventures Unlimited Press (what a coincidence!), which claimed that aliens gave Nazis nuclear and occult secrets. Amazing, is it not, that when you try to search for the claims made on Ancient Aliens you get product pages for books published by Childress?

The ghost of Philip Coppens tells us that crystal skulls “can be used against other human beings” to control their minds by focusing hypnotic rays. Go on and try it. It won’t work because there are no hypnotic rays. Do you think, as David Wilcock does, that the “frequency of your bioenergy field” can be raised or lowered by staring at crystal skulls, propelling your soul into other dimensions? If so, you’ve discovered a new branch of science and should really get on that rather than blathering on Ancient Aliens about how your discoveries mean people should give you money for books and videos and lectures for you to tell them more about what you refuse to actually investigate or demonstrate.

Let’s pause a moment and recall that the oldest date proposed for any of these skulls on Ancient Aliens has so far been 3,600 years before 1923, give or take. Somehow we are now traveling to Atlantis, around 9,600 BCE, which the show depicts, oddly, with Greek Ionic architecture, invented around 570 BCE. The show asserts that Atlantis stored its records in crystal-based computers, a detail not found in Plato or any other ancient source. (It’s another modern bit of faux-lore.) William Henry asserts that crystal skulls contain Atlantis’ computerized records, and we are meant to believe this is probable because Hitachi recently found a way to store binary code on a crystal chip, and quartz crystals are used in electronics. But that code is simply burned in by a laser and is visible under a microscope; the crystal skulls contain no such visible coding.

Philip Coppens tells us crystal skulls show up in Maya lands and Tibet, which are “specifically linked” as refuges for survivors of Atlantis—by whom? Certainly not Plato. This is warmed over Theosophy and has no basis in history, archaeology, or even ancient myth. Oddly, the show simply asserts that there are great similarities between the two cultures and never actually lists any, so therefore I will classify this claim as without merit since the show did not bother to defend it.

We listen to a repeat—from just minutes ago—of material about how crystals have great power and communicate with other dimensions, though this time replacing generic crystals with specifically quartz. It’s all but the same damn segment with a different word substituted in.

Now we repeat again the claim that the thirteen skulls need to come together in order to power on some ancient computer and transmit a signal to another dimension. I will remind you again that this claim does not exist before the twentieth century and is not genuinely ancient. I also do not need to say that extraterrestrials from another plant and beings from another dimension are not precisely the same thing.

Carolyn Ford, who is apparently fantasy-prone, judging from her claims and her self-designation as the “guardian” of a crystal skull she named Einstein, says that the skull talks to her and told her he’s a computer and has broadcasted to another dimension history, including the history of Atlantis, since the beginning of time. Sadly, he doesn’t talk when anyone else is around to hear him. We finish the show by having David Childress—who now explicitly identifies himself as an “ancient astronaut theorist” because it brings in the cash money, despite his earlier protestations that I lied in calling him one—photographs Einstein with “aura photography,” which is about as scientific as astrology. Humorously, the aura photographer, Jamie Jones, calls is “aura technology,” as though it were anything other than Kirlian nonsense with computer additions. I wouldn’t put much faith in the energy field being supernatural or alien without some controls testing other quartz crystals, non-quartz crystals, and other inanimate objects. Oh, and some kind of proof that auras are real.

Childress, Wilcock, George Noory, and others tell us that people are desperate, “up at arms,” and on the verge of doom, and the crystal skulls can help us launch a cultural renewal and give us a purpose in a material cosmos. Blah, blah, blah… new religion… blah, blah, blah… aliens are really gods… they just want to believe…. Oh, finally, it’s over.

24 Comments
Scott Hamilton
10/8/2013 03:48:30 am

“The entire mythology of the Mayans is based on extraterrestrial encounters in the past.”

Jason, do you know where that idea came from? I'm currently posting pages from a 1968 comic book called UFO Flying Saucers #1, and it starts out with ancient aliens material. There's a page on the Mayans, and it says "Mayan ancients" tell a story about a eagle that came from the sky, opened its beak and four "strangers" came out who couldn't breathe our air. I can't find anything in Mayan mythology that matches this, nor can I find the story in the Von Daniken and ancient alien books I have with me.

Reply
Jason Colavito link
10/8/2013 05:57:19 am

Tsoukalos is speaking out of his ass, where *everything* is aliens. However, I also am not familiar with any story of an eagle with strangers inside. I would suggest it's probably an invention of the comic book author.

Reply
Scott Hamilton
10/8/2013 03:02:07 pm

Could be, though it's a little odd that the other ten examples were pretty obvious, even if they went back to hoaxes or reports of meteors. I suppose Western Publishing was pretty successful portraying Amerindians, what with Turok, Son of Stone, so maybe they felt like they needed to get some in.

CharlesVerrastro link
5/1/2020 05:28:39 pm

This sounds like a late elaboration of the Incan (not Mayan) legends around Lake Titicaca. According to Incan mythology, it’s the birthplace of the first Inca king, Manco Capac and his sister Mamma Ocllo. Another myth says that the creator god Inti emerged from Lake Titicaca before creating the Sun, Moon and stars. Hence, the romantic nickname ‘the birthplace of the Sun’.

$kaяed2Яu
1/11/2014 01:18:19 pm

I search for truth, not saying that this is true, however I won’t allow others to dissemble my own finding when I put together sources to snap em together of what makes sense to me. I don’t like the UFO theorist to suggest that all things tie to Alien beings, although they are here & always were! Georgio even copied from my post word per word all the way down the God/Creator I know is the essence of me & my writing about this. I stated that as there are bad people on this planet, there are also bad aliens & some will tell you that they are out Gods, they are not! There are some that laminate truth & enlightenment & will say there is a God/Creator etc…so perhaps they are connecting these sculls to Aliens I think they are simple mans creation for we do have all the tools by design to do anything as God/Creator eh self experiences all we do as well! We are also magnificent beings that are creating all things on this planet as God/Creator created all things & we keep using our thoughts to construct outside tangible things. We use our body’s so our spirits can adapt on earth to FEEL & EXPERIENCE all the senses our body’s allow, where the soul sours cannot feel things in this realm. W/all this said, I have a picture of another Crystal scull if I may bring it here & show u? It’s in the Pocono’s & I want to share it w./someone before it’s gone!

Reply
Shane Sullivan
10/8/2013 06:21:14 am

Someone help me out, here; was David Childress in a Crystal Skull documentary last year, claiming to have personally experienced magical lasers shooting out of one of the skulls and projecting visions into his head? I know someone made that claim, but I can't remember who it was.

As for the stuff about the skulls coming from twelve planets--plus one extra skull--that sounds suspiciously similar to Battlestar Galactica's Twelve Colonies, with a thirteenth on Earth. According to Wikipedia, the colonies are themselves inspired by the Twelve Tribes of Israel.

For that matter, why are there twelve skulls, each with different information from one of the twelve planets, when all that information can be "[backed]-up" on a thirteenth, as Tsoukalos says? Obviously all of those planets were in pretty close communication, each having brought a skull to earth, so wouldn't it be more efficient to just "burn" all of that cosmic data onto a single skull, and maybe one or two backups? Or maybe the "backup" skull is the alien equivalent of a DVD, with a greater capacity than the other "CD" skulls...

Reply
Dave Erickson
10/8/2013 07:24:07 am

How are you going to fit all 12 skulls on just one DVD?!?!? The 13th skull is obviously Blu-Ray.

Reply
bigcalleoak
4/17/2015 02:00:20 pm

Fuck yeah

Michael hayden
11/13/2018 11:47:22 am

OMG. So funny.
I connected to the skull.
Still learning what it wants.

Paul Cargile
10/9/2013 02:43:06 am

So, how many skulls are they missing to get them all in one room together for the mind blowing cosmic laser show?

(Of course I know this is they last thing they want to do because nothing wil happen.)

Reply
Jim
10/9/2013 08:27:25 am

I think the critical aspect that the AATs are neglecting to tell us is that you must be on crystal meth to observe the power of the crystal skulls.

Reply
Dave Erickson
10/9/2013 08:41:40 am

Giorgio Tsoukalos: "Jim brings up a little known fact that AAT's have been aware of for years...ancient crackheads would smoke crystal meth not as a means to get high...but something about the lattice structure of the meth allowed them to visit the "Gods of the sky". Could it be that crystal meth is actually a stargate?!?

Reply
campblor
11/8/2016 07:30:58 pm

Ancient astronaut theorists say "Yes"

senorchompers
10/9/2013 08:03:33 pm

I don't get it. I thought it was all about the power of "3". Now it's about 13 skulls. For such a superstitious bunch you would think the number 13 would scare them off. Final thought: I think Giorgio is just upset he's never been abducted because he's aching for an anal probing. ;)

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Leslie
10/14/2013 03:58:42 am

I'm remember one day listening the radio show. Saying the crystal skulls, and the host said to be found in description the maya Popol Vuh. That's true? Please answer! thx

Reply
Jason Colavito link
10/14/2013 07:36:04 am

No, it isn't. The Popol Vuh has magic severed heads, artificial skulls used for balls, plants that grow skull-shaped fruit, etc., but no crystal skulls.

Reply
michael wilsn link
1/11/2014 02:14:13 pm

Learn English first then make your comments or ?'s !! thx---??

Reply
Bjørnar Ellertsen
6/12/2021 01:59:36 pm

To Michael Wilsn. Bullshit!

$kaяed2Яu
1/11/2014 01:29:08 pm

I search for truth, not saying that this is true, however I won’t allow others to dissemble my own finding when I put together sources to snap em together of what makes sense to me. I don’t like the UFO theorist to suggest that all things tie to Alien beings, although they are here & always were! Giorgio Tsoukalos even copied from my post word per word all the way down the God/Creator I know is the essence of me & my writing about this. I stated that as there are bad people on this planet, there are also bad aliens & some will tell you that they are out Gods, they are not! There are some that laminate truth & enlightenment & will say there is a God/Creator etc…so perhaps they are connecting these sculls to Aliens I think they are simple mans creation for we do have all the tools by design to do anything as God/Creator eh self experiences all we do as well! We are also magnificent beings that are creating all things on this planet as God/Creator created all things & we keep using our thoughts to construct outside tangible things. We use our body’s so our spirits can adapt on earth to FEEL & EXPERIENCE all the senses our body’s allow, where the soul sours cannot feel things in this realm. W/all this said, I have a picture of another Crystal scull if I may bring it here & show u? It’s in the Pocono’s & I want to share it w./someone before it’s gone! I also want to add that I am not afraid of the truth as some folks are, they will put down others who venture out of the religious realm, always know that whatever truths you find, God/Creator exist & eh is not a religion but will always have a safe place for you to land. If I'm brave enough to sift through the facts & be strong, so can you! All things are possible, open up all the doors & windows lest you be living a lie & fear gives you false beliefs. This is how wars & all things negative keep growing & surviving, so stop doing this. Gloryist is the day my children don't need me anymore. Giorgio Tsoukalos has my respect, he ventures truth & beyond the intrinsic values of man/thoughts. I tip my hat to him, he isn't saying God doesn't exist; he hints & suggest that God is in all of this. If I didn't know my facts, I to may be a hypocrite & offend his beliefs, but I want the whole truth, not only what others want me to think. I am a girl if this helps or hinders, but we are all the same but separate w/our own uniqueness. Thx4reading & I wait for a reply~

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$kaяed2Яu
1/11/2014 01:36:53 pm

I must add that I am a skeptic’s skeptic, I want facts only, I am seriously into the paranormal witch I often say it normal, so if you want to find out the truth in what the celebrity’s are saying about their paranormal experiences, dissect them. I believe they are lying, it’s all edit in story’s, they wouldn’t dream of stating that they had these things going on 20 years ago dor fear of condemning themselves! LIARS! It’s a free way for exposure & making money out of ONCE AGAIN_ WAIT FOR IT_REAL ordinary peoples real experiences, they always gotta get their dam ass’s in our reality’s truth! I know a few did have these things going on, it’s always a few out of a bunch, but c’mon all of them & they Follow the others who say they had this in their serious they share in together BS!

Reply
Michael Hayden
11/13/2018 11:58:32 am

I love you girl.. we are all connected. Have you seen the skull yet. I think you'll find out the skull of love is with you. And respects you. Some of us are old souls. And they search to see each other again. We are all going somewhere and yet there's no where to go. Or is there? Yes there is and that when we find our selves in search for truth and love .. threw meditation. Or I like to think of it as a trance where you let go of this physical therapy .and open the doors and windows of our self. Well said my lady. Please add me to Facebook. Message me too .. Michael Hayden . Guy with long hair. Karuk tribe. Okay ttyl

Reply
Alan masters link
8/3/2018 02:20:29 pm

I do find Acient Aliens fascinating however like all ancient myths and beliefs you have to keep a sense of balance and perspective. Ancient history, Theology and archaeology have been my passion since a kid, for nearly 50 years as an armature sleuth I have researched and read as much as I can get my hands on! The following are my beliefs founded on my years of personal research: Prior to modern man there is definitely evidence of an advanced race that lived on our earth, its clear this race influenced our early advancements and development. They possessed technologies beyond our current understanding, the reminisce of which some was left scattered around the earth for our ponderance, however, modern science is catching up and we are starting to catch a glimpse of how things may have worked in those times. Ancient cities are starting to be found at a faster rate in our oceans and most regions around the world, main stream archeology is having a struggle to accept new dating of these structures some thought to be between 15 and 20,000 years old! The underwater megalithic structure covers acres discovered in 150 ft of water in the southern ocean off of Japan and was broadcast for nearly a year on Japan’s national TV stations but didn’t get a mention on western media stations? I guess no scholar wants to be the first to face ridicule! From a religious standpoint I believe in a all knowing supreme being or power who has revealed himself to man in many ways, The Christian holy Bible and other faith based histories have very similar stories in particular when comparing with the Old Testiment. All are full of miraculous beings (angels) with god like powers but most or all answer to a supreme being! The problem theologians have to day is how do we rationalize the huge time line differences? Many believe the bible only goes back 5000 years, so how can we rationalize structures that could go back 20 and even 50,000 years? Medical Science has extracted our mitochondrial DNA and we now have a clearer picture of mans early beginnings. Modern homosapien appeared around 200,000 years ago, well after Dr Leakey,s finding, we also know there was a brief overlap with homosepien and Neanderthal man of approx 40,000 years. So how do we match all of these different time lines up? Well if you believe that it’s possible that these our ancient superior being forefathers lived on earth 200,000 plus years ago and that our Old Testament reflects that time, then everything starts to come together and make sense. In addition when we do fully understand our past i believe our future will become much brighter. As for the Crystal sculls, who knows, they may or may not have an energy we don’t currently understand, science is now certainly showing a related technology but in the bigger picture, it really doesn’ Matter, there are way to many other exciting findings being discoverd at a faster pace than ever before all over our globe as I write this, pushing the vale back further for humanity.

Reply
Miles
11/27/2018 05:22:24 am

I am interested in the source of the Pacific island god Tutula, as a cursory internet search has returned nothing of use. Is anyone aware of any site or text with information or an alternate name that is more commonly used.

Reply
Joseph link
6/15/2019 04:07:53 pm

My experience as a caretaker of a crystal skull over the last 10 years has for the most part been a good one. When I bought it in an international import store the merchant said it came to him after being in a warehouse in Africa for the last 22 years.
The unusual thing was it had a movable jaw and the skull was carved from a crystal that had 3 layers. Between the first two was a layer of Hematite and Feldspar which was encapsulated by the next layer of quartz. The carver made the skull expanded on one side to accommodate the occlusion.
The other thing it has indention's on the sides as if to be held in a frame with hinge. If supported this was a counterbalance could make it to look as if it were able to sing or talk. The only other skull I know if that has a movable jaw and modified to be able to appear talking was the Mitchell Hedges skull. If you look at the jaw (2) holes have been drilled up into both sides; this would make moving the jaw up and down possible.
When we purchased the skull we went to the first skull conference in 2009 we were not allowed to introduce the only crystal skull with a movable jaw.
The story of the 13 skulls goes that they were "singing skulls." So how can a piece of quartz with no detachable jaw be considered as such. It doesen't matter to me one way of another.
We had "nothing" to sell or made up stories to give the naive patrons. We had the skull for only 2 weeks and didn't know we had created a problem for the "profit motivated" closed group that considered us a threat to their business's. "So we found out later."
We met wonderful people there and shared experiences so made the trip worthwhile.
Since then we have chosen the "high road" and not exploited or associated with the "CARTEL"; our skull known as "COMPASSION."
My feelings are; "it's not what a skull (ancient or not) is it's what it does." None can be proven ancient anyway.
Jason, you have written an honest summery and called the exploiters just as they are. Those that understand our position have contacted us and spent time with COMPASSION. The issue is (to me) not weather a skull is magic'le but the lying to those that are opening up to their Spiritual sides and filling them with nonsense for profit. I do not wish to pass judgement only to give my side of the article. Thank you Jason

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