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Review of Ancient Aliens S15E08 “The Immortality Machine”

3/14/2020

31 Comments

 
Picture
Picture
A wit once commented that none of those who loudly advocate for the existence of a heavenly afterlife ever seem to be in much of a hurry to get there. For many years now, Ancient Aliens has told us that when we die, our souls travel to another planet to live blissfully with space aliens, in a degraded parody of Theosophy’s ideas about ascended masters living on the interdimensional duplicates of the solar system’s planets. However, despite this promise of extraterrestrial immortality, this week Ancient Aliens descended deep into the rabbit hole of crank pseudoscience with an episode devoted to midcentury “contactee” George Van Tassel’s Integraton, a building conveniently located at Joshua Tree, where the Ancient Aliens crew gathers each year for the Contact in the Desert conference. The dome-shaped structure allegedly facilitates time travel and rejuvenation, though it did nothing to provide Van Tassel with eternal life. It did, however, make for a tediously long hour of Ancient Aliens on a subject I cared less than nothing about.
Segment 1
The episode ends with Van Tassel’s death in 1978, and then they relate conspiracy theories that the government was somehow to blame. It’s true that the FBI monitored Van Tassel and infiltrated his UFO conferences, but the records of the time suggest that the real reason was concern that Van Tassel’s anti-atom bomb advocacy could pose a security risk by riling up the counterculture. According to the FBI, they were concerned that under the cover of UFOs, Van Tassel offered subversive ideas about social and economic issues.

After this, we are introduced to the wooden Integraton dome, which they imagine used “harmonics” to rejuvenate cells. Tassel had claimed the structure was 95% complete at the time of his death, and the show alleges that the government removed vital components after murdering Van Tassel in order to ensure that it could not function.

Apropos of nothing, the show segues awkwardly into a discussion of Chinese alchemy and its supposed potion of immortality followed by a discussion of the Greek gods’ ambrosia, which bestowed immortality. The show then wrongly claims that “every” ancient culture describes the gods as immortal. This is not, strictly speaking, true. The Norse believed that at Ragnarok their gods would die, for example. Baldur already had. After this, the show alleges that Biblical and Mesopotamian legends of ancient patriarchs and king who lived hundreds or even thousands of years recorded real lifespans of real “extraterrestrial travelers.” No evidence is given for the assertion other than Giorgio Tsoukalos’s certainty, which ought to count for nothing since he has no facts to support his belief and makes no effort to find any.

Segment 2
The second segment describes George Van Tassel’s involvement with Giant Rock, a boulder in the Mojave Desert that they describe as a “vortex,” though it is, as best I can tell, a rock. The story of Van Tassel’s interest in the rock is uninteresting, though I supposed there is some horror in learning that a prospector who lived under the rock committed suicide by blowing himself up to avoid the draft. The expert telling the story seems a little too amused by the horrific injuries of the men injured in the explosion. The show then irresponsibly suggests that the rock’s quartz content sent out energy beams that fried the dead man’s brain. Van Tasssel took up residence at the rock, meditated through its “energies,” and then claimed to encounter a UFO that landed beside the rock that sucked him up in an antigravity beam. The talking heads claim Van Tassel was a genius on par Thomas Edison and Nikola Tesla, though oddly, he left nothing of genius behind to prove it.

Segment 3
The third segment describes Van Tassel’s UFO conventions, which he used as a fundraiser for the Integraton, a building whose exterior took only a few years to raise but whose interior mechanics were never finished. The show repeats the claim that Van Tassel was a genius on par with Tesla in order to revisit the familiar story that Tesla had claimed to be in contact with Martians. Tesla thought he had received radio signals from Mars while Van Tassel claimed to be on a ship talking with space aliens, so it’s not really the same thing, as the show claims. In this segment, the show discusses the FBI’s interest in Van Tassel’s gatherings, though it alleges that it was due to concern for space aliens rather than the bureau’s well-known efforts to undermine allegedly subversive political viewpoints. As we head to a break, we hear that the Integraton supposedly rejuvenated human cells by zapping them with electromagnetic energy. There isn’t any scientific basis for this claim, but everyone treats it as though it is a commonsense belief that cells’ vital essence can be recharged like a battery. Science tells us that cells’ aging and death is programmed in their DNA, as their telomeres wear down. Ancient Aliens tells us that cells die because they are leaking mystical crystal energies.

Segment 4
The fourth segment sends David Childress to meet with Van Tassel’s protégé, Bob Benson, who tells Childress that Van Tassel left no information about how the Integraton would have been completed. Nevertheless, Benson came up with some ideas on his own, which he placed in a model that basically makes the thing into a giant Van Der Graff generator, if I understand the model correctly. Thomas Valone, another quack who thinks electricity can rejuvenate the body like James Whale’s vision of the Frankenstein monster, also has a model of the Integraton, and his has a Tesla coil in the middle to make big sparks. Childress tells us that Van Tassel compared the origins of the Integraton to God giving Moses the plans for the Tabernacle. Van Tassel also imagined that the Giza pyramids were piezoelectric rejuvenation machines, a pseudoscientific idea from the 1960s and 1970s made famous in the 1980s and 1990s.

Segment 5
The fifth segment speculates that the Integraton actually used sound rather than static electricity to produce its imagined effects. William Henry alleges that the Integraton was a model of Solomon’s Temple and therefore was a tabernacle to contact God, similar to the Ark of the Covenant, which rested in Solomon’s Temple. We hear that our brains have an interdimensional receiver that can be activated to receive signals from “otherworldly beings,” which somehow aren’t ever clearly aliens or angels in the show’s telling but something in between. William Henry immediately pushes this away and instead suggests that the Integraton would generate a portal to what he seems to imply is the heavenly afterlife dimension.

Of course, it could be that Van Tassel was a quack and the wooden dome was never going to do any of that. But that possibility can’t be allowed on the History Channel.

Segment 6
The final few minutes of the show celebrates the Integraton as a tourist attraction, and the narrator asks if the aliens will soon choose a “new human conduit” to order to finish the building. The segment repeats earlier claims from past episodes that humans never have any real ideas on their own but instead receive them through intelligence beams from space aliens. This claim was insulting the first time they made it, and it is still a depressing repudiation of humanity today. In the end, they never did provide any evidence of immortality, or even rejuvenation, and none of the advocates produced any in their models, either. It’s all just a bunch of nostalgia for the kookiness of midcentury ufology.
31 Comments
Hal
3/14/2020 10:16:01 pm

The contactees are still and interesting group and the Integraton is perhaps the only remaining structure from them. Your disdain and disgust at these shows clearly shows, you are successful in that regard.

Reply
Kent
3/14/2020 11:07:17 pm

That is super harsh Hal. I would say you should be ashamed but that would be harsh.

"For many years now, Ancient Aliens has told us that when we die, our souls travel to another planet to live blissfully with space aliens, in a degraded parody of Theosophy’s ideas about ascended masters living on the interdimensional duplicates of the solar system’s planets."

That's what most branches of Christianity teach by not teaching anything else because it's what most people imagine. Otherwise you're just hanging out looking at God all the time and that's just tedious.

"The show then wrongly claims that “every” ancient culture describes the gods as immortal."

Tsoukalos being Greek should know about Titanomachy and that what are commonly thought of as "the Greek gods" are not the OG Greek gods, a lot of whom were killed.

Sorry but I think killing yourself to avoid the draft is funny. But that's not what actually happened.

I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords.

Reply
Xena
3/15/2020 06:10:16 pm

I dated a well educated fresh off the boat Greek woman. She was quite bright.Turned out that my knowledge of Greek mythology gleaned primarily from watching the series Hercules: The Legendary Adventures starring Kevin Sorbo was way ahead of her.

Tsoukalos is of Greek-Austrian descent and born and educated in Switzerland. He majored in Communication and Sports Information in college. He isn't a bright person. Assuming that he knows much of anything about Greek mythology or its finer points can only lead to disappointment. Anything beyond memorizing the line "Greek Gods= Aliens" is beyond his skill set.

Major Tom
3/15/2020 12:23:55 am

It could be argued that disdain and disgust are appropriate reactions to those who insult one's intelligence and try to market nonsense for personal gain. Colavito has clearly demonstrated that they are insulting people's intelligence by promoting baseless claims. If you feel differently then why don't you engage in a point by point rebuttal of his review and demonstrate that disdain and disgust are inappropriate responses? This is a more rational reaction than just expressing anger at the fact that criticism occurred. What specific issue do you take with the logic and facts used in the course of the criticism?

Reply
Machala
3/14/2020 10:42:49 pm

Ancient Aliens can't even get their own conspiracy theories straight..."though I supposed there is some horror in learning that a prospector who lived under the rock committed suicide by blowing himself up to avoid the draft."....
I assume that they are referring to Frank Critzer, a German immigrant who came under FBI and government scrutiny as a possible Nazi spy, during World War II and was killed during a raid of his cave at the Giant Rock by Riverside County Sheriff's Dept. in 1942. A tear gas canister probably ignited his stash of dynamite.

Reply
Darold Knowles
3/15/2020 02:21:48 am

I read another report that, “three deputies visited the rock home to arrest Kritzer for the alleged theft of dynamite. The suspect was determined not to be taken away. He met the officers with a binocular case around his neck. Inside the case he had placed dynamite. When the officers approached, Kritzer set off the dynamite.“

Pretty strange regardless.

Reply
David Hollombe
3/15/2020 08:45:48 am

Critzer was no immigrant. His Prussian Gt.-Gt. Grandfather, Johann Kreitzer, settled in Virginia before the Revolution.

Reply
Jr. Time Lord
3/15/2020 04:01:43 am

"The show then wrongly claims that “every” ancient culture describes the gods as immortal."


The only immortal gods are a handful of stars around the North Pole. These Stars reside around the null point, or "the still point in the turning world". I will elaborate later today after finding a book. These stars appear to tie in with part of the symbolism of the Lady Liberty's statue. Something I should have taken SW to task on. The Chinese have an interesting cosmology regarding the Stars.


"The dome-shaped structure allegedly facilitates time travel and rejuvenation, though it did nothing to provide Van Tassel with eternal life."

This sounds a lot like the pyramid crap from the 70s. Claiming the pyramid shaped models could keep fruit fresh or sharpen razor blades.


"As we head to a break, we hear that the Integraton supposedly rejuvenated human cells by zapping them with electromagnetic energy. There isn’t any scientific basis for this claim, but everyone treats it as though it is a commonsense belief that cells’ vital essence can be recharged like a battery."

https://g.co/kgs/s2SDnf

If you're not already familiar, this is a pretty good read.


'William Henry alleges that the Integraton was a model of Solomon’s Temple and therefore was a tabernacle to contact God, similar to the Ark of the Covenant, which rested in Solomon’s Temple."

Solomon's Temple can be found in the celestial canopy. The Ark of the covenant can also be found in the celestial canopy being the exact same thing as the Royal Arch. Being from outer space himself, I'm surprised Henry doesn't know this.

Reply
Kent
3/15/2020 03:27:38 pm

Because Ark and Arch sound alike in English? Rubbish.

Reply
Jr. Time Lord
3/17/2020 02:52:20 pm

"The Stars which cluster around the North Pole have been seen as the celestial Royal Family since astronomy began, at least 4,000 years ago on the banks of the great rivers, Tigris and Euphrates. They are the rulers of 'the still point in the turning world', and the King, who sits on his throne, his left foot firmly planted on the Pole, was believed by the Babylonians to be the son of the inventor of astronomy. For the Greeks, however, they were Cepheus and Cassiopeia, the king and queen of Ethiopia, and their daughter, Andromeda, was the princess in the Stars nearby."

"The Lost Zodiac"
Tennant pgs 15-16

This isn't the quote I was looking for but it's close enough. Change out "inventor of astronomy" with "God" and you get the gist. Andromeda makes for an interesting connection to Lady liberty, due to the broken chains at her feet. Alamach is the star witch marks Andromeda's chained foot. Alpheratz, or Sirrah marks her head and ONE CORNER of the "Great Square" of Pegasus. I have lost count of the examples showing Lady Liberty to be the corner of a square without any logic behind it, other than "the Masons did it".



Kent
3/15/2020 03:27:38 pm
"Because Ark and Arch sound alike in English? Rubbish."

You are correct. That is rubbish and an argument, I have never once made in my life. The Arc and Arch are the same due to the underlying symbolism. Absolutely nothing to do with the English language.


Reply
mogimbo
3/15/2020 04:34:12 am

It's fascinating how pseudo beliefs tries to attach itself to certain scientific concepts. Electromagnetism, quantum mechanics and my favourite "vibrations" - which I guess is about acoustics and sound, or possibly leylines or was it magnets again? There's probably a lot written on the different pseudo beliefs about emerging technologies, would be interested in tips from commenters. The camera was instrumental in the new era of spiritism and of interest in auras, ghosts and the like in the 19th century. Was there a similar situation regarding radio? Early computers, radar, steam engines?

Reply
Kent
3/15/2020 08:43:57 pm

Pretend ghost hunters from the 20th and 21st centuries have used and continue to use radio frequency receivers and tape and digital recorders in their pretend ghost hunting.

Reply
Darold knowles
3/15/2020 11:07:19 pm

The idea of an “observation” causing quantum wave function collapse has led to an entire industry of wacky pseudoscientists attaching the phenomenon to various ridiculous theories involving human consciousness, spiritualism, etc . . .

Reply
Reality is reality
3/15/2020 08:48:14 am

_The segment repeats earlier claims from past episodes that humans never have any real ideas on their own but instead receive them through intelligence beams from space aliens. This claim was insulting the first time they made it, and it is still a depressing repudiation of humanity today._

————--
God: You want to know if there is intelligent life elsewhere in the universe? Yes. Of course.

Question: Is it as primitive as ours?

God: Some of the life forms are more primitive, some less so. And some are far more advanced.

Question: Have we been visited by such extraterrestrial beings?

God: Yes. Many times.

Question; For what purpose?

God: To inquire. In some cases to gently assist.

Question: How do they assist?

God: Oh, they give a boost now and then. For instance, surely you’re aware that you’ve made more technological progress in the past 75 years than in all of human history before that.

Question: Yes, I suppose so.

God: Do you imagine that everything from CAT scans to supersonic flight to computer chips you imbed in your body to regulate your heart all came from the mind of man?

Question: Well…yes!

God: Then why didn’t man think them up thousands of years before now?

Question: I don’t know. The technology wasn’t available, I guess. I mean, one thing leads to another. But the beginning technology wasn’t there, until it was. It’s all a process of evolution.

God: You don’t find it strange that in this billion-year process of evolution, somewhere around 75 to 100 years ago there was a huge “comprehension explosion”? You don’t see it as outside the pattern that many people now on the planet have seen the development of everything from radio to radar to radionics in their lifetime? You don’t get that what has happened here represents a quantum leap? A step forward of such magnitude and such proportion as to defy any progression of logic?

Question: What are You saying?

God: I am saying, consider the possibility you’ve been helped.
————-
Conversations With God - Book 2: An Uncommon Dialogue by Neale Donald Walsch

Reply
Crash55
3/15/2020 10:54:35 am

I fell asleep during the episode and luckily reading the blog confirmed that anything I missed was drivel.

The total lack of scientific understanding on the show continues to amaze me. Yes quartz exhibits the piezoelectric effect but that would not have the crystals producing electricity while embedded in the boulder. The crystals would produce electricity when stressed but that electricity dies off over time. In order to get a steady flow of electricity you need to constantly oscillate the stress level.

Reply
An Anonymous Nerd
3/15/2020 11:22:06 am

The Fringe invasion continues.

As to the show itself it's descent into fantastical madness also continues. I'm glad Mr. Colavito posts these reviews, and I'm glad they bring attention to him and his work, but it's disturbing to see how, over time, the show descends to the point where debunking nearly is a moot point -- yet the popularity endures.

Searching for the divine using a hideous and twisted mockery of the tools of science. It would be a weird horror movie were it not reality.

-An Anonymous Nerd

Reply
William
3/15/2020 02:18:49 pm

Hitchen's Razor cuts nicely here in terms of the self-debunking aspect of these shows. Unfortunately the concept is lost on those whose mentality is quite similar to those whose idea of analysis and evidence is to use six degrees of separation to promote the conspiracy theory that Jews are committed to world domination.

Reply
Darold Knowles
3/15/2020 02:34:55 pm

Actually, a hole blown out of gigantic rock in the Mojave Desert doesn’t sound like a bad place to live right now.

Reply
Naked and Afraid
3/15/2020 03:32:02 pm

Unless you spent hours exposed to people with the virus or other nasty bugs while standing in lines at various businesses to stock up on toilet paper, beer, gas, ammo and ramen noodles before heading off to lay low during the apocalypse. Not to mention that living in a cave in a desert carries a wide range of risks and is probably far more unhealthy than being holed up in an apartment a block away from a hospital full of coronavirus patients.

Reply
Darold knowles
3/15/2020 05:03:41 pm

You’re definitely correct in pointing out those potential problems Mr. Naked and Afraid. But the biggest drawback in my mind is that it’s unlikely that such a remote location would have access to a WiFi connection or a cellular data signal and therefore I would not be able to submit comments on this blog while living in the rock hole. I’m now beginning to understand why the people who have lived in the hole have all gone insane!

Reply
Naked and afraid
3/16/2020 06:26:53 pm

The argument could be made that up until this past weekend avoiding the discourse here would be the best way to maintain sanity.

My comments about stocking up on supplies was a little tongue in cheek until I saw a news clip of hundreds of people lining up by the hundreds outside of Walmart in order to get inside and shove their way thru hundreds more people to buy that last pound of hamburger and gallon of bottled water. I would rather stay home and live on rationed cans of Campbell's soup and tap water and use my old socks as bum fodder for the next month than risk that type of exposure.

Then I just drove past the public library where the tweenagers and teenagers are now congregating since the schools were closed down to prevent them from congregating.

The stupidity is already well under way.


Doc Rock
3/16/2020 12:42:54 am

It is not particularly relevant to this specific discussion but a little FYI. The March 2020 issue of The American Legion Magazine has a brief piece by Christopher Mellon (A Threat Unmet: Our Military Continues to Encounter Unidentified Aerial Phenomena, but the Government Appears Neither Curious Nor Courageous Enough to Investigate). It is his current spin on UFOs but a quick glance suggests that he kept the woo to a minimum. His bio info includes: "he is an advisor to the To the Stars Academy for Arts and Science, a privately owned media and scientific research company. I've decided to wait until the fifth pint of Guiness before diving into the article. It will be part of my substitute St. Paddy's Day celebration since the coronavirus has resulted in the plug being pulled on the festivities at my 1st through 3rd favorite Irish pubs.

Good luck with the new moderating policy. As my Mennonite neighbors say, "unblemished tomatoes are worth the sore fingers." It loses a lot in translation. But you get the gist of it.



Reply
Scrolls Downer
3/16/2020 12:52:53 pm

Slightly off topic, but relevant to the gullibility of both the fringe and mainstream ... from today's The Guardian International:

They were always suspected of being one of the most elaborate hoaxes in history but now it’s official: the fragments of the Dead Sea Scrolls for which an American museum paid millions of dollars are fakes, experts have said. Steve Green reportedly paid millions for the “scrolls” for his Museum of the Bible in Washington DC. But a team of researchers have concluded after exhaustive testing that they are probably fakes made of old shoe leather.

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2020/mar/16/dead-sea-scrolls-fragments-at-museum-of-the-bible-are-all-fakes-study-says?

Reply
Nick Danger
3/16/2020 02:29:39 pm

Mr. Colavito, I am thrilled to hear about your new policy regarding comments!

Be sure that many of us appreciate the extra effort implementation of the policy requires. Those of us interested in the subject thank you.

Reply
Leveque
3/16/2020 02:42:28 pm

In the month prior to implementation of the new policy there were around 7 articles with approximately 20 or less comments, and that was after several days or weeks of activity. This article was posted after the policy went into effect and already has over 20 reasonably civil comments. It is great to see some regulation and emphasis on quality rather than quantity without the comments section dying as some people feared. Thank you.

Reply
Tomas
3/16/2020 03:12:36 pm

I’ve been watching AA from the beginning, and I don’t know of any other series that has been as successful.
What I find more intriguing is that most of the comments here, are not ones that I would expect to come from lovers of the series. If some of you are that skeptical or have this many complaints, why are you watching ?

Reply
Doc Rock
3/16/2020 04:00:18 pm

I remain convinced that the AA viewership includes a lot of college-age kids who like to smoke pot and watch the show as a form of campy entertainment. Ditto for some older people. That doesn't mean that they can't voice skepticism. Then there are people like me who are occasional involuntarily exposed to portions of the shows. It only takes about 5 minutes of exposure to AA under any circumstances for many rational people to have any number of complaints.

Reply
Kent
3/16/2020 04:10:12 pm

I believe Blue Bloods, Big Bang Theory, Miami Vice and American Idol were also successful. 20/20 seems to get a lot of viewers. Just imagine what I would have said here before the New Dispensation.

Whom exactly are the "lovers of this series"? Myself doesn't watch it.

Reply
Bezalel
3/16/2020 04:55:18 pm

At least Three reasons to watch
1. Entertainment
2. Obligation to understand what irrational people believe and how irrational peoples’ beliefs are being supported by indifferent money hungry media
3. Obligation to respond and instruct others as to why such material is irrational, against the dangers of believers gaining a position of power or responsibility.

Entertainment is fine as long as that’s as far as it goes but I have learned there is a strong correlation among people who are superstitious or otherwise incapable of critical thought/mental development and those who would attempt to erode personal freedoms.

Religion and irrationality go hand-in-hand. Both are opposed to the scientific principle of gaining knowledge and changing knowledge based on testing and evidence.
Plenty of religious people in this country have political authority.

Therefore my and your freedoms are at risk.

Reply
Kent
3/16/2020 05:51:39 pm

Thanks for the tip! If you believe there are such obligations that's fine for you but such obligations do not apply to me.

"Entertainment is fine as long as that’s as far as it goes but I have learned there is a strong correlation among people who are superstitious or otherwise incapable of critical thought/mental development and those who would attempt to erode personal freedoms."

How gracious of you to allow entertainment! I don't know and don't think you know what you mean by "correlation", but I remember well the days of Mao and Stalin channeling RamTha and building shrines to the Blessed Virgin.

It's not that religious people strive to run the world it's that people who strive to run the world pretend to be religious.

Deja Vu
3/16/2020 07:00:19 pm

You skipped over the first two words of Bezazel's post. Important stuff.


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