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Review of Ancient Aliens S16E08 "The Space Travelers"

2/27/2021

23 Comments

 
Picture
Picture
Last week, Ancient Aliens rose total audience, climbing to 998,000 viewers, an increase of almost 50,000 viewers over the previous week’s William Shatner special. But the number of younger viewers watching ticked downward, knocking the show out of the top twenty for the night. I continue to remain amazed that about a million Americans will watch Ancient Aliens even when it simply repeats old material from previous episodes and shamelessly copies and pastes. But people also pay good money to stream reruns of The Office they’ve seen many times before, so I guess it’s to be expected. However, since Ancient Aliens is putting no effort into sewing together Frankenstein’s monster episodes from cadaverous parts, I won’t put that much effort into reviewing it. According to my blog traffic statistics, reader engagement with Ancient Aliens has collapsed. In past years, thousands, often tens of thousands, of people would research the show and find their way to my reviews in the first week after publishing them. This past week, 602 people read my review—fewer than read archival reviews! It just isn’t worth the effort.
This episode at least attempts to find a way out of the pandemic’s restrictions on travel, although it’s really just a slightly different framework for what in sitcoms we’d call a clip show—those unpleasant episodes where characters all gather on one set and reminisce, remembering as 90-second scenes from past episodes pad out the money-saving outing. I can’t guarantee without checking that the clips are literally pasted from past episodes or if the producers have simply recreated them with new voiceovers, but the information is exactly the same. I will give them credit for one thing: Compared to the rapid pace of early seasons, they have consistently found new ways to slow the show down and present fewer topics and less information per hour each season.
 
Giorgio Tsoukalos, Travis Scott, and David Childress stick around the conference table used for the Shatner episode, apparently filming this episode after Shatner left the room. Tsoukalos takes Shatner’s chair and leads a confusing, unstructured discussion of space travel that lauds private space exploration because—big surprise for a show appealing to old white men—it’s free from government regulation and public accountability. “They can do whatever they want!” Scott enthuses.
 
Childress is not good at extemporaneous speaking.
 
A chunk of a 2018 episode about Russian cosmism is pasted in. Returning to the conference room, Childress leads into another clip from a 2016 episode referencing the Salyut-7 UFO sighting.
 
After the break, Tsouaklos, Scott, and Childress—the world’s least sexy throuple—interview an astronaut who tells them that he thought he saw a UFO in space, but it was just lights from South American fishing vessels. Then we hear from Buzz Aldrin in clips from previously recorded footage about his supposed UFO sightings in space. Additional claims that astronauts saw unidentified lights or objects are presented, though the astronauts themselves do not claim they are alien spacecraft.
 
The next segment continues the discussion of a NASA conspiracy to suppress UFO reports from astronauts, all of which boil down to arguing that anything in space that wasn’t immediately identified must be suspicious, and when it was identified must be a cover-up and a lie. Some of the footage is quite old, from episodes I either didn’t watch or don’t remember, especially since Edgar Mitchell, treated here as though in contemporary interview, died in 2016.
 
In the succeeding segment, the Three Stooges blather on about humanity’s DNA-driven destiny to explore space, and then we get more claims of strange lights seen by astronauts, this time aboard Skylab, with the Stooges attempting to rebut the official explanation that the red light seen aboard the space station was a reflection of a light inside on the window. Some old footage from what I think was a 2012 episode is presented with commentary I believe is the same as a 2018 episode, though I am not interested in sitting through it all to check.
 
The next segment discusses the potential for life on Mars. Tsoukalos calls the potential for bacterial life on Mars disappointing—“big whoop!”—and instead longs for humanoids that “look like you and me,” presumably white men. Bits from earlier Mars episodes are recycled, but truthfully, they’ve done so many episodes about Mars that I couldn’t pick out which ones were strip-mined for this segment. The show discusses how humans might live on Mars before going down the well of claiming that various rocky outcroppings on Mars might be alien monuments. The Stooges debate whether humans came from Mars or are destined to colonize Mars, or both. They agree, in a very depressing way, that humanity can’t survive without finding new planets to exploit for resources. Their conclusions are weirdly Darwinist for people who don’t believe in evolution, arguing that survival requires colonization and extinction will follow if we do not adapt. Of course, their view is teleological, speaking repeatedly about destiny without ever quite explaining what power has decreed such a destiny.
 
The Stooges end the show by discussing Edgar Rice Burroughs and the three all agree that they were heavily influenced by early- and middle-twentieth-century science fiction stories. They say such stories provide templates for their efforts. Who would have guessed? Oh, right. Me. At least they’re being honest about it now.
23 Comments
Doc rock
2/27/2021 10:33:47 am

If one watches the Office for the third time it is because they appreciate quality comedy. If one watches Ancient Aliens for the third time it is probably because they are an idiot or were too stoned or senile to remember having watched it.

Reply
Clete
2/27/2021 04:57:13 pm

I remember when a group of us, while in college, would sit around and watch Ancient Aliens. Ever time the phrase "Ancient Alien Theorist say yes" to any half baked idea we would all take a slug of whatever we were drinking. After a hour (actually forty minutes, lots of commercials In AA) we would all be totally blasted. That is the only time their theories made any sense.

Reply
Doc rock
2/27/2021 06:16:00 pm

That's why, no matter what the statistical trends suggest, I remained convinced that a decent sized component of AA viewership consists of 18 to 22 year olds sitting around their dorm rooms getting baked while making fun of Tsoukie's hair.

RiverM
2/28/2021 07:35:41 am

Take a drink every time Jason disparages the white man and you're sure to black out.

DVRs and the cutting of cable television service are likley responsible for low AA viewership numbers. The same doesn't apply to blog viewership; maybe there is a correlation with disparaging a particular demographic.

Doc rock
3/1/2021 09:48:50 am

Better change that to "a white man" or "some white men" or it will be a very boring game. Still cheap date level drinking compared to hoisting a cold one every time a member of the kiddie table sticks their fork in the electric socket.

Jim
3/1/2021 11:46:44 am

"18 to 22 year olds sitting around their dorm rooms getting baked while making fun of Tsoukie's hair."

It's not just the youngsters doing this.

"every time a member of the kiddie table sticks their fork in the electric socket."

That is how Giorgio gets his hair so perfect.

Nick Danger
3/2/2021 12:27:06 pm

Speaking as a white man, I have never felt disparaged by Jay, and have no idea what you are talking about.

"Hit dog hollers" I guess.

Rock Knocker
2/27/2021 05:23:46 pm

Or they watch it again for the comedy affect. Or they want to compare Jason’s insightful comments to the actual video. Or they are writing a book/article concerning the vast wasteland that is television. Or because they just want some background noise while doing something else. Or they can’t believe it was that bad. Or because.......

Reply
Kent
2/27/2021 07:00:19 pm

The Office runs constantly and free of charge on my cable system. If I could find some pot I'd probably give it another chance.

Ancient Shatners I will dip into from time to time as hating it is not part of my religion.

Reply
Christianity
2/27/2021 07:44:15 pm

Is there a sacred psychedelic in existence that makes the sex urge docile and for that reason is considered to be sacred and holy. Was this the substance that Paul ingested and converted him to Christianity and turned him into a virulent and aggressive mysoginist.

Reply
Joe Wilson
3/3/2021 11:38:54 am

No source-critical scholars believe that the virulent misogynies are the historical Paul's own words. That is one common traditional exegesis, but it is based largely on one of the Pastoral Epistles, 1 Tim, which was written by Pseudo-Paul. The famous misogynistic passage in 1 Cor 14:34-35 is widely regarded either as an interpolation or a quotation and refutation of an opponent's views, commonly misinterpreted in translation.

All the best historical evidence is that Paul represented the egalitarian female-empowering faction in the early Church. He commissioned his female students and authorized their public speaking.

The portrait of Paul as a male-supremacist is a misrepresentation based on a few key passages which are decontextualized and distorted.

To be fair, that blatant misrepresentation happened quite early in Church history and has maintained popular support for a long time. The Latin western manuscript tradition even shows evidence that the key passages were carefully rearranged in the epistle (1 Cor) to protect the misogynist reading. But that doesn't make that particular reading true. Paul was engaged in heated disputes with people who thought like that, and later those views were wrongly attributed to Paul himself by the pastoral forger.

See:

Odell-Scott DW. Editorial Dilemma: The Interpolation of 1 Cor 14:34-35 in the Western Manuscripts of D, G and 88. Biblical Theology Bulletin. 2000;30(2):68-74

Reply
Jason believes in the word pornography
2/27/2021 07:51:56 pm

Jason Colavito is offended by graphic adult erotica and calls it "pornography". He kneels down before the altar of the word "pornography".

There are 2 categories of people who worship the word "pornography".

First, the obvious category of people that were born sexually docile. These types of people sometimes die as virgins because they are never ready to lose their virginity during their lifetime. Also. there are married couples who not only sleep in separate bedrooms but live in different houses.

Secondly, there are people who indulge in nuptials like flies and rabbits and could teach lessons to Casanova and the Marquise de Sade - these people also object to graphic images and movies and worship the word "pornography" like the first category described above,

Reply
Corey
3/2/2021 03:04:45 pm

What in the world does this have to do with this post or even this site generally?

Reply
COME ON JASON - READ THIS AND LEARN SOMETHING
2/27/2021 07:55:30 pm

Jason Colavito is offended by graphic adult erotica and calls it "pornography". He kneels down before the altar of the word "pornography".

There are 2 categories of people who worship the word "pornography".

First, the obvious category of people that were born sexually docile. These types of people sometimes die as virgins because they are never ready to lose their virginity during their lifetime. Also. there are married couples who not only sleep in separate bedrooms but live in different houses.

Secondly, there are people who indulge in nuptials like flies and rabbits and could teach lessons to Casanova and the Marquise de Sade - these people also object to graphic images and movies and worship the word "pornography" like the first category described above.

Reply
LEARN SOMETHING JASON - READ THIS
2/27/2021 07:56:52 pm

LOL

Jason Colavito is offended by graphic adult erotica and calls it "pornography". He kneels down before the altar of the word "pornography".

There are 2 categories of people who worship the word "pornography".

First, the obvious category of people that were born sexually docile. These types of people sometimes die as virgins because they are never ready to lose their virginity during their lifetime. Also. there are married couples who not only sleep in separate bedrooms but live in different houses.

Secondly, there are people who indulge in nuptials like flies and rabbits and could teach lessons to Casanova and the Marquise de Sade - these people also object to graphic images and movies and worship the word "pornography" like the first category described above.

Reply
Kent
2/27/2021 10:36:37 pm

KPIO!

Reply
Rock Knocker
2/28/2021 09:26:13 am

The troll is strong with this one......

Reply
PKnox
2/28/2021 03:16:41 pm

So, on Twitter Jason tells us that he worked for pornography websites. Does that explain why he has tried to conceal his real work history? Can articles now describe him as "former pornography worker" or "current pornography worker?"

Reply
Jason Colavito link
2/28/2021 06:22:40 pm

It would be false to describe my work as such. I worked for an organization that provided copywriter services to businesses that did not have staff writers. I was never employed by or even interacted with the translation firm, which, incidentally, only provided language services. I literally wrote about 2,000 words of text, which were entirely about translation services.

Reply
Anthony G.
2/28/2021 06:54:15 pm

A man goes to the doctor. Dr asked him what's wrong. The man immediately drops his pants. The doctor exclaims, "Holy cow, your penis is orange!"
The doctor asked the man if he lives near a nuclear power plant. The man shakes his head no. The doctor then asks if he travels by a nuclear power plant on the way to work. The man replies, "I don't work"
The doctor then asked, "What do you do all day?"
The man replies, "I insult everyone on the internet, eat Cheetos, drink beer and watch porn.

Reply
Ibram X. Kent
3/2/2021 12:07:50 pm

Perhaps the most interesting question raised by such posts is why, when they are so badly written, self-indulgent, and intellectually nugatory, when they are so plainly written in the spirit of what Karl Popper called reinforced dogmatism, they should be so popular among the Western intelligentsia. Let us hope that this is not a question for an Edward Gibbon of the next millennium to answer.

KPIO!

Reply
Anthony G.
3/9/2021 05:11:41 am

Must have hit close to home. I could hear your panties twist as I read your words. You seem to have the wrong idea of Orange being the new black. It doesn't work that way, Sparky.

KPIO???

Kent's Palm Is Orange?

What exactly are you trying to admit to? Unless you're admitting to being the moron posting all the nonsense to Jason Colavito's blog about being a porn author.
Kent Posts Dumbshit Online?

Does your stack no longer work for you? Kent's Porn Is Obsolete?

Do you beat your family?
Kent's Palm Instills Obedience?
They probably don't appreciate the orange handprints.

Have a blessed day.

James Patrick Ryan
3/27/2021 11:19:40 pm

FYI it's Travis Taylor, not Scott. He WAS good on Rocket City Rednecks. He does have a shit ton of Doctorates.

I was Associate Producer of a Dannon meeting where Jerry Linenger was the keynote. Not a bad guy. His stump speech about living through the MIR fire is decent.

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