Remember how A+E Networks, the owner of the Ancient Aliens trademark, said that they had hoped to turn Ancient Aliens into a “lifestyle brand”? Well, it seems that some of the show’s competitors have latched on to the bandwagon, rolling out new merchandise and lifestyle opportunities, both for believers in ancient astronauts and for believers in Fallen Angels. When A+E Network’s official Alien Con for fans of Ancient Aliens was a huge success last fall, their partner in the endeavor, Famous Monsters of Filmland, decided to launch an unofficial spinoff conference called Alien Expo that is pretty much the exact same thing but without the official involvement of Ancient Aliens. The company has begun selling merchandise for the new conference, and in so doing they have attempted to assert a trademark over the term “Ancient Astronauts,” which appears as a logo on an “Ancient Astronauts” branded set of t-shirts. It was not clear whether they were asserting trademark over the words “ancient astronauts” or the logo created from them, but it would seem to be rather difficult to assert a trademark on those words since they have been used as a generic descriptor for about fifty years. The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office does not have a record of registration for the trademark, and Famous Monsters uses the “TM” symbol for a common-law assertion of trademark. But this was nothing compared with Steve Quayle’s efforts to market and merchandise the Nephilim-hunting lifestyle. This week, he and L. A. Marzulli announced that they are teaming up for the first time to participate together in a vacation tour of Peru for Nephilim believers. The all-expenses-paid vacation package gives a maximum of twenty guests a seven-day tour of Cuzco and its environs for $7,900, and entitles them to attend panel discussions with Nephilim theorists, but it does not include the cost of travel to and from Peru.
The conference will explore whether Bible giants built the Inca ruins of Peru, and they will allegedly provide “irrefutable evidence” that the Inca could not have built said ruins. They also promise to go in search of the “underground world” (derived, ironically from Helena Blavatsky) in which the Nephilim retreated to hide out. Quayle’s team, operating through their GenSix Productions corporation, named for the Genesis 6:1-4 Biblical passage on giants, said that they are running the vacation tour for profit, and they will be using the profits gained from the twenty tourists who pay them $158,000 to attend to make more Nephilim-hunting DVDs that they can then sell at $19.99 apiece (or $9.99 streaming) to still more Nephilim believers for enhanced profits. But wait, there’s more! Quayle is also hawking a line of Genesis 6 sculptures! He calls them the GenSix Productions Legacy Sculpture Series, and they feature depictions of massively large cannibal giants slaughtering animals, massacring tiny humans, and doing other savory things you’d love to have on display in your home or office. Quayle missed an opportunity, though, in not having the sculptures, made by “faith-based” sculptor Mark Patrick, cast for mass production. Surely every Evangelical would love to have one for the kids’ bedrooms, like a more ominous Elf on a Shelf. But, anyway, Quayle says that each of the four kitschy sculptures will be awarded to the first four patrons to give him $25,000, $50,000, or more. Note carefully that you are not buying the sculptures for $25,000 or $50,000 apiece but rather are donating the money for the production of more Nephilim-hunting videos, to be sold to all comers for $19.99, for which Quayle will generously send you a sculpture in return. The first sculpture, available for a pledge of $50,000, is called “Romans Battle with the German Giants” and depicts a fictitious misreading of Roman history in which, allegedly, the “giants” of Germania slaughtered 35,000 Romans in a single day. This is based on a lie, namely that Diodorus’ references (5.28.1 and 5.32.2) and those of Caesar (Gallic Wars 2.30.4) to the Gauls being very large meant that they were Nephilim giants. Therefore, any Roman battle with Gauls was necessarily a fight against the Nephilim giants. The second sculpture is more depressing. It depicts the Mi’kmaq culture hero Glooscap as a rampaging giant, lustily seizing Buffalo. Let’s leave it at saying that the depiction of the Mi’kmaq hero is culturally insensitive. I wonder what the Holy Bloodline theorists who think of Glooscap as Henry Sinclair, Earl of Orkney instead of a Nephilim think of that. The third sculpture depicts what Quayle calls, with incorrect spelling, the “Appenine Giant,” and it is a miniature of a massive outdoor sculpture in Florence known as the Apennine Colossus, constructed by Giambologna in the sixteenth century. Quayle has confused it with a different giant, however, and mistakenly believed that Giambologna’s symbolic god of the Apennine Mountains was based on a real set of giant bones. He has apparently conflated the symbolic 35-foot-tall sculpture, built for the Medici, with Boccaccio’s Sicilian giant (in reality a fossil mammoth), which Kircher had estimated at around the same height, or one of the other alleged giants uncovered between 1300 and 1700 that were later exposed as fossil elephants. The final sculpture depicts the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. I guess I pity Steve Quayle a bit. His theology forbids him from accepting the Book of Enoch, which is the actual original source for the cannibal giants he pretends to hunt in the name of the Bible, so he can’t illustrate scenes from Enoch or the equally apocryphal Book of Jubilees in his sculptures. Instead, he has to hunt for fake Nephilim elsewhere, in stories that are far enough removed from theological heresy. But it also means that he’s intentionally trying to shoehorn improper material into an Enochian framework, and he doesn’t even do it well, carelessly throwing spaghetti against the wall. Not to be cynical here, but the business model is rather transparent: Quayle solicits large amounts of money from true believers, uses it to make DVDs, and then sells the DVDs for profit. Thus, the solicited money doesn’t go directly into Quayle’s pockets, but funds the modestly priced products whose profits do. He is very adamant in informing his audience that their tourism dollars and donations go only to funding DVD production, but he is silent on who profits from DVD sales. In theory, if his DVDs were as successful as he claims, shouldn’t their profits be enough to fund the next DVD? If Quayle were doing good work or making a positive contribution to the world, no one would begrudge him earning a living from the fruits of his labors. But his cash grab is in service of deeply objectionable objectives. He promotes and exploits paranoia and fear, tirelessly pursues a deeply reactionary political agenda, and has hinted at his desire to see gay people executed. Worst of all, he does so by dressing up his prejudices in the holy robes of the Elohim, telling the naïve, the vulnerable, and the devout that his anger and fear represent God’s will. He should take his tacky statues and go back to the pit the Nephilim crawled out of.
19 Comments
Riley Venable, PhD
1/15/2017 10:58:06 am
I disk reed your site yesterday. Brilliant!
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Shane Sullivan
1/15/2017 02:27:54 pm
Agh, you beat me to the idea of explicit angel-human coupling sculptures. =P
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Uncle Ron
1/15/2017 09:36:53 pm
That part was very funny. The rest was simply purile.
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angela
4/28/2019 01:06:19 pm
you are just, so... wrong. very wrong. but i'm much more talking to this guy who wrote the article. i can't even consider a sentence out his mouth because Steve Quayle is a man that i trust more spiritually, on the most important things, than anyone else in the world. you just don't get it obviously, pretty much all of you who are going to be commenting on this i'm sure. but honestly, ask yourselves- right here on the brink of eternity, and it all ended to day would you go to hell? you probably already know you would. you know, if there was a hell. but you don't believe in hell- right? well, let me tell you. hell is very real. but let me tell you what is much more terrifying than that is the wrath of God. because god believes in justice, and there's lot of injustice going on right now to the innocent and the righteous. so i'm just saying. think about your life. who's side are you on? are you wicked? maybe you want to think about changing your ways. God will forgive you
Only Me
1/15/2017 11:35:16 am
Steve Quayle is an oxygen thief and it's fucking terrifying that he might be judged fit to look after himself. He can cling to his Bible under false pretenses all he wants, but keep him away from sharp objects and a gun!
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Scott David Hamilton
1/15/2017 01:12:23 pm
I realize this is the absolute least important element here, but what do the Four Horseman have to do with Nephilim?
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1/15/2017 01:39:29 pm
Nothing, really, except that in Quayle's theology, the Nephilim return to herald the start of the End of Days. Since the Nephilim are, for him, gay, he sees gay marriage as the beginning of the End Times and signaling the arrival of the Horsemen.
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Scott David Hamilton
1/16/2017 09:24:20 am
Ah. That's pretty boring. Watching the statue video you can see Quayle nearly have an orgasm when he mentions the imminent End Times, so I guess he just does what he can to fit it in everywhere.
Titus pullo
1/15/2017 02:57:55 pm
Interesting business model. Investors get no return on investment unless they buy what their investment monies create which is probably less than their investment. In other words a big fat negative ROI.
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Kal
1/15/2017 08:08:39 pm
Fifty thousand dollars? Hah ha haa! If you have that much money to burn on trinkets and scuptures, do something else with it. Ha.
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El Cid
1/15/2017 09:16:59 pm
Clearly the so-called "Statue of Liberty" is actually documentation of how we were dominated by giant torch-bearing Nephilim just 130 or so years ago.
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Phillip
1/16/2017 01:05:37 am
I am at a loss for words.
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Apparently Steve totally ignores the Hebrew word "Elohim" in Genesis is a plural term..."Elohim" is terribly translated in English as the singular word "God" in Genesis chapter ONE when they create the FIRST race of Mankind. Then in Genesis chapter TWO, after an apparent cataclysm of some sort, a completely different entity comes on the scene and THIS time doesn't "create" Man, He (likely a "She" BTW) "formed" Man...and it's not "Elohim" this time that makes Man, this time, She's called the "Lord God" (Heb. YHWH). There's even a clear THIRD creation account later in the Bible. But I dont want to overload anyone at the moment :). Anyway, what is crystal clear is that the term "Elohim" had never meant, nor will EVER mean, the supreme Creator... according to the text, the little gods made Man, and it lines up more with the Cuneiform creation of Man, than anything else.
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Raparee
1/16/2017 07:50:03 am
:The second sculpture is more depressing. It depicts the Mi’kmaq culture hero Glooscap as a rampaging giant, lustily seizing Buffalo."
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Clete
1/16/2017 11:22:42 pm
I am sure the city of Buffalo did not exist during the time of the supposed Glooscap.
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8/2/2020 02:37:18 pm
As a born and bred native of Buffalo let me assure you there was a Buffalo back then. The present city was named from the American Indian designation as interpreted by the early French explorers as 'Beau Fleuve" or 'Beautiful River". Clearly the lonely Giants were seduced by the gorgeous shimmering waters of Buffalo Creek (where I used to fish as a youth) and couldn't control their sexual impulses with the local fauna.
DaveR
1/17/2017 01:01:22 pm
Nice way to avoid paying taxes.
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Kal
1/17/2017 01:43:10 pm
Genesis chapters 1 to 3 are a trinity and therefore it's like Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Either that or it's three translations for God. The female God is from the apocrypha, but it would be an interesting twist to find out that God is a Goddess. They did not specify. Maybe God does not need gender, but in Earth cultures dominated by men, 'He is in their image', We (the trinity) made God in our image, in our image He made them. He made first Man but did he make angels and fallen angels? It seems they were already there, suggesting before time? That could get very deep and run down several bunny trails.
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Dora
1/24/2017 12:03:55 am
"World class sculptor?" That is funny!
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